House rules
The holidays are over but cold and flu season is not! Having a sick child is, I'm sure, stressful for any parent. Having two infants who you watch fight for their lives for months (then bringing said infants home in peak plague season) is downright terrifying. It will ensure all your OCD tendencies around germs reach their full potential and anxiety surrounding the possibility of ending up BACK in the fucking hospital is at an all time high.
Have you ever watched people just exist, but from a germ frame of reference? We're DISGUSTING. To the people who don't cover coughs, sneezes, throat clearing at all… GET OUT. You make my brain hurt. To the people who still cover their cough/sneeze with their hands… Thank you for trying, but it's time to stop getting everyone sick with your old fashioned good intentions. It's time to try chicken face! Yes. Chicken face. Ask any preschooler. We sneeze into the crook of our elbows nowadays. Is it perfect? Of course not. Is it better than expelling snot and spit into your mitts, then touching your phone, your wallet, your friends, that shopping cart, the menu, your steering wheel… anything… Yes. Yes it is. (Edit: A most fantastic friend and fellow therapist (and soon to be mama!) said she also calls it “Vampire Sneeze/Cough”… Genius. Appropriate. Wonderful.)
We are so lucky to have wonderfully supportive friends and family who want to come meet the girls. You have to understand, however, that while I want the girls to meet all the great people in their life, you asking if you can come visit is definitely going to trigger all kinds of thoughts for me. Did you just get off a plane? Was the person next to you a disgusting hand cougher with measles and whooping cough? Do you have kids? Are they in daycare/school where the plague lives? Are they sick and you just don't know it yet and now you are also a walking germ pile? These are things I think about. Regularly. All the time. Right now, I'm thinking them.
The hospital is an important place where fantastic people do life saving jobs… And I don't want to go back. So, if you want to come visit, there are two basic rules:
No vaccines, no visits.
You and your family must have your flu shots and up to date DTaP/Tdap boosters.
You and the people you live with must be healthy. If you’re sick, we'll look forward to seeing you later.
If you can check those two boxes, the girls would love to meet you! If not, we'll look forward to hanging out after cold and flu season is over, vaccines have been had, and they have a better chance of protecting themselves from the rest of us.
If you do check those boxes and come visit, here are a few things to keep in mind…
Wash and sanitize your hands/phone when you get here.
Do not kiss babies who are not yours.
If you need someone to chew or suck on your fingers, ask a consenting adult. Do not put your fingers in my kids’ mouths.
It seems like a lot, I know. But it really isn't. It's just trying to keep people safe who can't do it for themselves. Chicken face. Wash your hands. Alcohol based hand sanitizer. Stay home when you're sick. These things are life. Thank you for helping us live.
